My View Commentary
The Theory of Goodness
Many of us are trying to make lemonade out of the lemons life keeps throwing our way. Everyday conversations and interactions often seem to carry an Eeyore-like cloud overhead, and discussion can sound like an act of futility.
The constant stream of information only adds to the confusion and uncertainty. At times, it can feel like a quagmire, a kind of Darwinian survival of the fittest of mind, body, and spirit.
Yesterday, a client told me that he used to believe most people were fundamentally good-hearted, but now he is no longer so sure. I, with my thick rose-colored glasses, still believe in the theory of goodness.
Another client this week shared some surprisingly good outcomes that emerged after a theft he experienced. Hearing how friends and family showed up to share lemonade, figuratively speaking, brought tears to my eyes. Goodness arrived, naturally and generously.
Why I Still Believe
For a long time, many of us have trusted and believed in goodness. The idea that it is basic human nature to do the right thing for the right reason has generally felt solid and well-founded. However, that belief may be under serious challenge, but it has not been extinguished.
I still choose to believe the theory holds. I still believe we begin life with a natural desire to be a good person. Maybe that is because I have spent so many years around young children. Rarely, very rarely, have I questioned a child’s inherent virtue, and when I have, it made my blood run cold. Those moments have felt like the exception, not the rule.
It sometimes looks as if the exceptions are working overtime to break the rule, but can they really? Most of the world’s religions have guided us in the direction of The Golden Rule, or the Law of Reciprocity, which invites us to treat others as we would wish to be treated. I prefer that invitation.
How Goodness Is Practiced
Throughout my life, I have held onto sayings I did not fully understand at first, but eventually I would figure out their meaning. One biblical phrase was “heap coals of fire on his head.” It means to respond to anger, hatred, or mistreatment with unexpected kindness, similar to the saying, “kill them with kindness.” The wording sounded aggressive to me, but I liked the concept.
Lo and behold, I was offered the chance to put it into action. One day, while going to lunch, I parked alongside a row of cars near the restaurant. At least, I thought I had parked alongside the road.
When I returned to my car, a man with flaming red hair stormed up to my car window shouting, “You parked in my yard!”
I looked out my car window, I looked at him, and replied, “You are right. My tires are in your grass. I apologize.”
He continued shouting, “You parked in my yard!”
I continued to calmly say, “You are correct. I will be happy to repair any damage.”
He abruptly stopped shouting, looked at me and said, “You are not going to fight with me.”
“No,” I answered, “because I accidentally parked in your yard.”
He smiled and calmly commented, “It doesn’t look like there is any damage.”
We smiled at each other, said goodbye, and I drove away.
That day, I finally understood the coals of fire.
Sincerely practice kindness. Sing songs about it out loud. Hum them while traveling and shopping. Goodness and kindness can soothe the individual, and perhaps it might be “catchy.”
A Living Expression of Goodness and Kindness
One meaningful way to live out kindness is to participate in moments that lift us up. Experience the sounds of goodness. Sing in the shower, whistle while you work, or sing out loud with the car radio. Smile, connect with others, and sing.
Heap on the kindness and make a joyful noise!
Rethinking Therapy: From Survival to Thrivival
“Not everybody has a Carla,” a client once told me.
It’s true.
Therapy, as it is commonly understood, is usually limited. The work between a therapist and a client is often to solve a presenting problem and successfully end the relationship. The client is supposed to be fixed.
The general thinking about therapy is that you find a therapist when symptoms become so distressing that everyday living feels impossible. When family and friends get exhausted from hearing about your struggles, or when you become withdrawn and stop answering calls and texts, someone might say, “You need to see a therapist.”
It is mind-boggling that therapists are often used to only fix symptoms rather than to help prevent them.
Life does not move in a straight line. Changes and major life events occur throughout every developmental stage. Sometimes a person simply needs to talk, to think aloud, or to have help negotiating what they are facing. Often, they need a trusted person outside of family or friends to assist with reflection, decision-making, and perspective.
Instead, we are expected to be “fixed” and then figure out life’s challenges alone, even when our thoughts are swirling so intensely that we feel as if we are drowning. Wouldn’t it be more reasonable to contact a therapist and say, “I need to talk. I have a lot going on”?
We see our primary care doctors regularly or at least have one to contact when we are sick. We get regular haircuts and often see the same stylist for years. We take our cars in for routine oil changes and maintenance. We even change air filters to extend the life of our heating and cooling systems. Why don’t these same principles apply to mental health maintenance?
Because we are “fixed”?
Surviving life stressors does not need to be the end game. Thrivival, growth, needs to be the goal. Mental health should be viewed not only as the treatment of illness, but as part of regular healthcare upkeep.
Most of us have a primary care physician for our physical health. Why not a primary care therapist for our mental health?
A primary care therapist is someone you can call, simply and confidently, “my therapist.” This therapist supports ongoing stability and growth, helps strengthen healthy behaviors, assists in preventing mental health crises, and addresses both old and new concerns as they arise. A primary care therapist is a helper, coach, teacher, and clinician who knows your story and is available for the questions and crossroads of real life.
A shift in perspective is needed. Sensible thinking about mental health growth and support is long overdue.
May we move beyond survival.
May we mentally and emotionally thrive.
Labels
What is Psychoeducation?
What is Psychoeducation?
We want to give ourselves an identity. We want to understand why we act, think and feel the way we do. We want to explain ourselves to others.
The “go to” is to give ourselves a label so we can say, “I am this.” However, does the label fit?
Pros of Psychiatric Labels
Access to treatment:
A diagnosis can help individuals access appropriate therapy, medication, and support services tailored to a specific condition.
Understanding and validation:
A label can provide understanding and validation of personal experiences helping individuals feel less alone.
Communication with healthcare providers:
Clear diagnostic terms facilitate communication between patients and mental health professionals leading to better treatment planning.
Cons of Psychiatric Labels
Stigma and social discrimination:
Labels can perpetuate negative stereotypes about mental illness, leading to social stigma and discrimination against individuals with a diagnosis.
Oversimplification of complex experiences:
A single label may not fully capture the nuances and complexity of an individual's mental health struggles.
Self-fulfilling prophecy:
Internalizing a label can lead individuals to believe they are defined by their diagnosis potentially hindering recovery efforts.
Misdiagnosis and labeling bias:
Diagnostic criteria can be subjective, leading to potential misdiagnosis and biased interpretations of symptoms.
Concepts to Remember
Individualized approach:
While labels can be helpful, it's crucial to consider each person's unique experiences and needs when discussing diagnosis and treatment.
Open communication:
Open communication between individuals and healthcare providers is vital to address concerns about labeling and ensure appropriate treatment plans.
Focus on recovery:
Emphasize the potential for recovery and positive self-management strategies, not just the diagnostic label.
What To Do:
A complete psychosocial history and psychological testing by a clinical psychologist is the best way to determine diagnosis. Unfortunately, most insurance stopped paying for psychological testing years ago unless it is neuropsychological testing for cognitive issues, prior authorized and physician referred.
Some plans cover psychological testing, but coverage is often limited or requires prior authorization. Asking your doctor to refer you to a clinical psychologist for psychological testing may be possible for insurance reimbursement.
Educational testing for a child can be requested by a parent, and generally the school system must comply with that request. There may be resistance and delays. However, there are organizations and laws that assist with parental requests for testing. A good place to start is the Learning Disabilities Association of America:
Please do not settle for short questionnaire assessments to determine a definitive diagnosis.
What is Psychoeducation?
What is Psychoeducation?
What is Psychoeducation?
Education, Education, Education!
Psychoeducation is a critical part of any therapeutic and recovery process.
Psychoeducation is education about psychiatric, psychological and social functioning.
Psychoeducation involves providing clear and credible information to clients and families about mental health conditions in order to improve understanding, support and treatment.
It can also encourage and motivate the client to become involved in the educational process of learning about their psychological and social experiences.
Psychoeducation is a structured learning therapy that helps people understand their mental health, the challenges they may face, and how to cope with them.
What Is It?
Psychoeducation is a step by step way to teach people about their mental health condition, its treatment, and how to manage it.
What Does It Do?
Psychoeducation can help people, and their families, improve their quality of life and overall well-being. The more you know, the better the potential levels of functioning and recovery. Psychoeducation can help people become directly involved in their treatment and make it more effective.
What Does It Involve?
Psychoeducation can help clients and their family members better understand the specifics of a mental or emotional condition, and how to best negotiate positive functioning and outcomes. It also involves teaching skills like relaxation techniques, cognitive restructuring, problem-solving, communication, and emotional regulation.
When Is It Used?
Psychoeducation is an important part of treatment for most mental illnesses and positive mental health development. Clients of all levels of development and functioning can benefit from having a better understanding of their health status and from learning skills and techniques for regulation.
Benefits:
- Empowers people
- Prevents misinformation
- Improves awareness
Psychoeducation can help people understand how their condition affects their daily lives. The goal is to increase understanding and improve quality of life.
The word "psychoeducation" has been part of the mental health language for decades, but it is sometimes not recognized by search engines or familiar to the general public. It simply means education about a mental health illness or condition.
What To Do?
Ask your therapist for as much credible information as possible about a diagnosis or condition.
Continue searching for credible resources provided by reputable organizations and clinicians. Social media is not necessarily the most reliable source of information.
Look for key terms such as "evidence-based", and check licensure and credentials of the individuals who are writing or providing videos on illnesses, conditions and disorders.
Remember the words "credible, evidence-based, reliable and valid."
The more that you read, the more things that you'll know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.
—Dr Seuss
Keep it Simple
What is Psychoeducation?
Keep it Simple
Keep It Simple!
"Keep it simple" is phrase that means to make something easy to understand or do. It is not necessary or beneficial to practice or explain mental health using complex or highly intellectual, academic terminology.
We can learn to describe and explain even complex mental health and mental illness conditions using words and language that are understandable and practical.
Teaching a fifth-grade classroom of twenty-nine boys and seven girls about fractions was one of those life changing experiences for me. I had taken a teaching position for a teacher who was on pregnancy leave. The children were learning about fractions. However, there was not a child in the classroom that understood how to use them.
We created games, stories, plays, and creative learning experiences to bring fractions to life. The administration became concerned about the amount of time being spent on fractions and pushed for me to move through the curriculum at a more rapid pace. But I was not going to stop until each child was able to grasp the concept of fractions and apply their new knowledge in a practical way to their own life. We did it in record time.
It was not always easy to design ways to present a concept to thirty-six young minds because of the individual learning styles. Some children were auditory learners, some visual, some both auditory and visual, and some needed tactile, hands-on experiences. So, we "played" fractions until every child was able to “get it,” according to their own learning style.
This experience has carried forward in my clinical practice, where I help educate clients of all ages and learning styles in finding their optimal mental health and negotiating mental complications, often called disorders or illness, as they arise. Information must be shared in a way that is practical and applicable for each individual.
Helping clients become educated about their own health is an absolute necessity for achieving their personal optimal level of well-being. It is equally necessary for healthcare providers to continually engage in research and ongoing education and training.
What To Do:
Clients
Ask Questions.
Ask for information to be explained in a manner that is easy to understand.
Do not walk away more confused than when you entered the session.
Get a second opinion if needed.
Clinicians
Take the time to help your client understand what you are saying.
Ask for feedback to determine understanding.
Simply ask if what you are saying is making sense.
Practice Patience.
Without questions, there is no learning.
—W. Edwards Deming
An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.
—Benjamin Franklin
Any fool can make something complicated. It takes a genius to make it simple.
—Woody Guthrie
Contact Carla
Please Send Questions and Suggestions
Mary Carla Davis, LCSW
